Notes from an Orphan

I been a orphan for over three months. At firss I thot I would quit SLiving but I pushed myself to stay in school at least. Thankfully too cause being on my own kinna forced me to do things I never dun before. Like meet lotsa new people an lettem get close. My frens are now my fambily.

I also been on many fambily trials. An thass kinna wats brought me to write tonite.

Alla trials I had inna lass three months have all taught me sumpthing about tha world of second life an about my own self. Im grateful for alla them. An many of them are still in my life today. I now know wat I want an wat I really dont want inna fambily.

But I also see patterns with people.

Growd ups get really essited to play house. Summa them fall in love an get married an then think it will be fun an cute to have a SL kid an start a fambily. But wat thay dont take inna consideration is tha feelings of us SL kids. Thay love tha idea that a lil one adores them an looks up to them. But then after a day or a week or a month tha newness wears off an parents get bored an thay toss us aside.

I juss dont gettit.

For tha record potential parents, kids are kids. We are needy an dependent. If we werent, we would be growd ups like you. If you wanna start a fambily please be shur you are ready for tha commitment. Take note...

Things I am
a child, dependent, curious, emotional, growing, loyal, needy, loving

Things I am not
your mini therapist, your new bestie, your partner, your bank, your slave, your new shiny toy, arm candy, a fashion accessory, a mind reader


Im discouraged tonite. Im disappointed in sum people I really thot had their fambily values in check. But I gess its all for show. Im still deciding wat it is I wanna do as far as immediate fambily. It seems Im best on my own. But Im not a SL kid to be fully independent. I have a growd up for that.

On another side, Im really impressed with sum other people an their ability to be honest an show up an be loving. Thay are my forever fambily, my extended fambily, my friend-fambily. I gess thass allat matters rite now.

The Beauty Coin

Homework # 2

To receive a Beauty coin, you must seek an opportunity during that week where you act with beauty. It could be doing something nice for someone, sharing something special with a friend, anything you want. You can then choose to either write a journal entry about how you acted beautifully, or draw a picture of what you did to show beauty to others.

This was our homework assignment. Ive chosen many opportunitys to act with beauty. I been especially more aware of it inna last cuppla days since getting this homework. But Im struggling with tha actual assignment of writing about it. To me an act of beauty stands beautiful on its own. To write about how I acted beautifully somehow stains the beauty of the act. I would much rather write about an act of beauty I experienced or one that I witnessed or heard about. Beauty is an experience.

For instance, I am between fambilys rite now. My really close fren has found her perfeck fambily (finally) an I coudnt be happier for her. I met her fambily one nite anna cuppla hours later, outta tha blue, thay offered to be my foster parents. Juss like that. Thay had no intentions of adding any more kids to their lives. An I had stopped looking for fambily. But thay did a beautiful act by opening their home an fambily to me.

There are so many examples of beautiful acts just like this in my daily life. Its wat inspires me to give back or pay it forward. Whether I am acting in beauty, witnessing beauty or experiencing beauty, its all beautiful.

Samwich for Sagey

Topic of the Day: Invent a new kind of sandwich, Describe what is on it and how you would make it.

Um this is hard caus I dont really like food much. So I think I will make something for my baby sister. Sage loves candy and cookies. As she says tanny an tookies *rolls my eyes*

I like candy an cookies too but Im in soccer training so this is for her. OK so I will take my favrit kind of cookie, chocklit chip. But only tha cookie dough, no chips. I like tha batter. So tha samwich "bread" will be cookie dough. Duh I alreddy said that. OK then I will take Sage's favrit candy, Skittles. Its her favrit caus her aunty gave her sum wen thay very first met an now Sage always eats em an passes em out to frens. Even her favrit colors. So Skittles will be inna middle of tha cookie dough.

Uhhh so I gess its a skittle samwich on cookie-dough.

The Power of Peace

Topic of the Day If I had a super power what would it be and why?

This mite sound dum but I would want a super power that gave evrybuddy tha chance to understand wat other go through so we can be more compassionate with people. I wouldnt expect evrybuddy to be happy alla time or be nice to each other always because we need balance. But I would expect us to be less reactive. Like I wanna give us tha power to respond to situations an people with compassion. Not juss react outta fear. So wats that super power? Tha power of peace? Lets go with that.

Stranded on an Island With...

Topic of the Day: If you were stranded on a deserted island with three people from SL, who would you choose and why?

Wow! This is a cool quesson. I woud choose my forever mommy because she knows how to take care of me an we laff an tell good storys together. I woud also choose my fren Jennah because she always sees tha good in any bad situation. She can make art out of anything so we woud live in a beautiful island. Aaaan lets see...I woud choose Rain because shes been my fren for a very long time an she recently lost fambily too so we could explore an have adventure together!

I would let Lilly stay because she jus found a great mommy an I woudnt wanna take her away frum that. Oh but Jennah did too. Hmm...Maybe Id let Jennah stay so she coud share her art with evrybuddy onna mainland.

So to replace Jennah I woud choose...uhmmm...Avy! Because shes still looking for fambily too an she can make an adventure out of nothing an nowhere. Yah! Aaaand I know my forever mommy would love Avy lots too.

Not that I hope it happens. 0.o

Tha Gilmans

One of tha things we are doing this semester in Miss Jill's class is visiting our classmates homes. We are learning about community an fambily an traditions an rituals. Fambily can look many diffrent ways. If the common theme is love and everyone is working toward the same goals then that makes a fambily.

Our first visit was to Aiyden's an Kenzie's home, which happens to also be Miss Jill's home. We learned that thay have fambily time scheduled so no matter wats going on, thay can all count on a certain day/time to be together. An thay have this really cool thing where one member of tha fambily gets to pick out wat thay do as a fambily together. An it rotates so evrybuddy gets a turn for each fambily nite. So cool.

Miss Jill an Mr Gattz are very bizzy in SL an RL an thay run their house like a real fambily home. Thay run around getting ready for school an work an thay hav breakfass an dinner together. Thay stay connected in RL an SL an thay are there for each other no matter wat.

Aiyden says he gets tha amount of RP he wants. Like its there if an wen he wants. Thass cool caus sumtimes we as kids dont always need RP an sumtimes we do. Well thass me anyway.

Thay take fambily vacations which I think is really cool.

I think wat I really value most frum seeing their fambily rituals an dynamics is that their Second Life is an enhancement of their Firss Lift. An thass how I see my SL. It doesnt replace Firss Life, it adds to it.

Eggbert Florentine Loved

Topic of the Day: How did having your egg affect your Second Life and responsibilities to others?

At firss I dinnt want tha sponsibility of being a egg-parent. Im a kid. I juss wanna be sponsible for me an even then its a lot. But wen Miss Jill told me I have a baby egg-boy I was so happy an proud. I felt like I hadda pay extra attention to things an people an make shur he woud be safe an protected.

I was really sad not to hav good bilding skillz caus I spent a lottttt of time trying to make him look like my lil Eggbert Florentine Loved. But wats moss important is that I loved him with all my hart.

We did lotsa stuff together. We went to Africa where we rode an fed tha elefants.


We went to Paris on the Eiffel Tower. An then we went to my favrite place inna world, Australia, an talked to some really frenly kangaroos.



An then we practiced soccer together. He's a good player. He should try out for our team. Thass my boy! *wipes a proud tear*

Its My Second Life

Topic of the day: What is your greatest accomplishment in Second Life?

Wow this is a great question. Ummm Lesseee... Wen I losst my fambily a cuppla months ago I thot my second life was gunna be really really sad an I almost left. But I stuck with it an kept trying. I was in a new school an for tha firss time I loved it. Like really loved it. I mean I still love it.

An I joined tha soccer team an that was fun. Kept me bizzy with social stuff an thass way important for me. Caus Im usually like quiet an I keep to myself. I have a few really close frens but dint hav lossa frens. But now with alla stuff to keep me involved I been so happy.

An as time passed I got close again with my forever mommy. Well we never were *not* close but we were juss hurting. That time an space made us realize how much we love each other. So now we are like closer than even before. Plus Im on trial with a fambily an Im meeting lotsa new an nice people like alla time.

So my greatess accomplishment in Second Life I think is that I dinnt give up. Im living by my own advice. I tell people "Its your second life, live it how you want. We all deserve to get our needs met. If yours are not met first then you wont be able to meet anyone elses needs." So yah now Im way more available to frens an fambily cause my needs are mossly getting met.

I Try...

Question of the Day: What is your favorite trait that you possess and why?

Wow, it's so easy to find favrit traits about my frens an fambily but to pick a trait of my own that i like is much harder. I no wat i love about other people but do I really have tha traits that I think I have?

I think my favrite trait that i possess is that I try to see tha good in all people. Im not perfect so I dont always succeed. But like I said, I tryyyy.

Like there are sum people that its really easy to see how nice an loving an smart an good thay are. But wat about those who are not openly like that? I say I dont like meanies - an I really really dont - but I still try to see at least one good thing in even tha meanest meanie. Even tha ones who are like meanies alla time to me. Caus nun of us are perfect an some people juss dont get along. An we dont hafta get along. But I still believe theres good in every person. It actally makes me sad wen I have trubble finding a good trait in sumone else.

Nobuddy is born bad. Its juss impossible. So if sumone is like mean then maybe thay only had mean things happen to them an thass tha only way thay no howta treat people. But if one person can still see sumpthing good in that meanie then maybe that meanie wont always be a meanie sumday.

So yah I dunno if my trait is that Im good to people cause Im not always good to people. But its that i TRY to see good in people an be a good person too.

Aussie By Proxy

Topic of the Day: If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

This ones easy for me. I onny wanted to live in two places in my entire life. One is California (an i live there alreddy) an tha other is Australia.

I been wanting to go to Australia since i was way little, even before i knew wat or where it was. An recently, thanks to tha internet an SL, i been meeting lotsa good frens frum Australia. I love it so much i call myself Aussie by Proxy caus i wanna be Australian. An all my frens frum there are tha proxys.

I wanna live onna east side of Australia but i wanna visit it all. Imagine not jus seeing pichurs of geckos onna windows but hearing them an touching them. Wow. An koalas an kangaroos. But even tho roos are cute an stuff, they are also not very nice so we shoudnt get too close to them. They box n thay ar tuff.

I love that California an Australia share tha same ocean. Makes me feel that much closer to where I wanna be.

My Soccer Ball

Topic of the Day: What Is/Was Your Favorite Childhood Toy

Ugh. How did I know this was gunna come up sumtime? Tha thing is, I dunno tha answer. I dinnt an still dont really have a favrit toy.

While all my classmates are excitedly writing about all their favrit toys, Im here racking my brain. Its been a thorn in my side as an SL kid trying to remember favrit toys. Even in SL Im a bit of a dork an dont really hav toys. I like games an stuff but not really toys.

Oh wait! Does a soccer ball count? Lately thass been my favrit thing to play with. Even tho Im really bad at it I need tha practis so I try to play with it as much as possible. OK yah lets go with that. My soccerball!

Forever...

...is forever.

Topic of tha Day: If you could fix Second Life, what would you do?

Uhmmm I dunno, is it broken? kinda huh? ok so this is kinda a loaded question. My SL is tha moss important thing to me. Otherwise, why be here rite? An recently there have been lotsa changes in my world. Some were out of my control. Others were all my doing. And some were a combined effort. Either way, this is where I am now.

Tha one thing I wish I could fix in my (second) life is my relationship with my truest mommy. We split recently for a few reasons. It was the hardest an worst day of my life an I know it wasnt easy for her either. But what Im learning is without this split we woudnt be where we are today. I mean I woudnt be able to see tha depth of my love for her, the true connection we have with each other. For that I'm thankful.

I know I cant change tha past but I can only change how I behave in tha present an future. So frum now on i choose to change tha way I express myself to those I love an never wanna lose. An shes someone I never ever wanna lose. No more hiding my true feelings, even if it mite hurt someone else. Because in this case it only hurt me an her...for a long time.

No one can compare to her. No one can take her place. No one will ever live up to her abilities as a mom for me. I know things cant be tha way I wannem to be but at least I know shes in my hart forever.

Firss Day - Second Semester

WOW. firss day of tha second semester alreddy. im so lucky to be in ms. jills class again. i lucked out lass semester to be in her class. this is like a miracle. i love my school. i love my teacher. an i love my class.

this is me n jennah on our firss day this semester. we hav a huuuuuuuge class now. its kiiiinna overwelming but also lotsa fun with new kids to meet.

jennahs like my bess fren in school. an shes a good fren outta school too. *giggles*